The Longing To Be Independent

February 25, 2017

The Longing To Be Independent

Yes, you want to be independent, but are you ready for it? Independence is something that must be earned. Your parents want you to be independent. They don’t want you to be dependent on them the rest of your life.

What you really want is the freedom to make your own decisions. Isn’t that right? Are you sure you have the discernment that is needed to make wise decisions? The decisions many young people are making clearly indicate that they are lacking in discernment.

Discernment is the ability to for see what the outcome will be from the decisions we make. Hebrews 5:14 says that we need to be able to discern between both good and evil. Sometimes we make a decision to do something based only on the anticipated excitement that we will derive from it. No thought is given as to what the outcome might be.

Let’s suppose that one of your friends in high school gets the bright idea of decorating with toilette paper a small tree that is in front of the principal’s house. He invites you and a number of his friends to join him in it. You may think “That sounds like it would be a lot of fun. It would just be a practical joke. He is a fun loving guy. He should take it alright.” After school you all go to the store in your friends car and buy two bags of toilette paper. You split the cost. A little after 10:00 at night you all drive by the principal’s house. The lights are all off so you assume that he must be in bed. You drive around the block again and stop in front of his house. You all get out with two or three rolls of toilette paper under your arms. The tree is only half decorated when all of a sudden two police cars stop in front of the house and turn their flashing lights on. Before you can say “Well done” you are all hauled off to the police station.

You are all charged with illegal entry or trespassing. You may not go to jail for it, but it will go on your police record. If you had asked your parents permission to be involved in the prank, do you think they would have given you permission? It is doubtful. Proverbs 1:10 says “My son, if sinners entice thee, consent thou not.” What an embarrassment it would be if your mug shot came out in the local newspaper saying you had been arrested and charged with trespassing.

Your parents are responsible for you if you are a teenager living at home. Be thankful for all they do for you. They have a right to put limits on your liberty. They do it because they love you and want the best for you.

As your parents see you mature, they will most likely give you more liberty because they see that you can be trusted. Proverbs 6:20-21 says “My son, keep thy father’s commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother: Bind them continually upon thine heart, and tie them about thy neck.” Your parents are a better judge of your maturity than you are. The following are some suggestions of things you can do to give your parents reason to think you can be trusted:

1. Ask your parents for advise and take their advise

2. Do things around the house that need to be done without being told.

3. Do your best to obey the rules your parents set for you.

4. Be diligent in completing with your responsibility.

a. Try hard to get good grades in school.

b. Be careful in the way you spend the money that is entrusted to you.

c. Be courteous and go out of your way to do things for others

5. Make friends with those who have high standards and are respected.

Be thankful if you have parents who put limits on your liberty. That shows that they love you. Some parents put little or no limits on their children. Later they are ashamed of them, but it is too late to do anything about it.

Be patient. The time will come when you will have your independence. Your parents want to teach you now so you will have wisdom to make good decisions when you have your independence. Later you will be glad your parents didn’t let you do all the things you wanted to do. Then you will be able to say what Solomon said in Proverbs 4:3-4. “For I was my father’s son, tender and only beloved in the sight of my mother. He taught me also, and said unto me, Let thine heart retain my words: keep my commandments, and live.” Children, brought up under the supervision of wise caring parents, will be the responsible adults of tomorrow.


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